“Who’s in your corner?”

When I ask moms in therapy, “Who’s your support system?”…

I usually get silence. Sometimes a blank stare.

Maybe one name, if that.

And it breaks my heart every time — because I know how heavy life feels when you’re carrying it all on your own.

That’s why this month, the newsletter will focus less on me and more on tools to manage anxiety, worry, and stress.

And the first tool I want to talk about is something we often overlook: our resources.

Internal vs. External Resources

Think of resources like the two sides of a coin:

• Internal resources → the skills and strengths you can draw from inside yourself. Things like your faith, your ability to reframe negative thoughts, your breathing practices, or your resilience built over years of surviving hard seasons.

• External resources → the people, places, and communities outside of you that can help you regulate, ground, or just feel less alone. Think trusted friends, therapy, your church, a local mom group, even a WhatsApp thread that makes you laugh on a hard day.

We need both to manage anxiety, stress, and trauma symptoms.

Internal resources help us hold steady on the inside. External resources remind us we don’t have to do it all alone.

A Real-Life Example

Recently, I decided to do something brave for myself: I reached out to another mom I met on Instagram. We grabbed coffee, and from that one connection, doors opened.

Her name is Stephanie O’Neil — mother of two, lawyer, and the founder of Moms Beyond the 9 to 5. Since that coffee, she’s invited me into her professional network and even added me to her WhatsApp group. She showed me firsthand that external resources don’t have to be big or complicated — sometimes they start with one brave “yes.”

Here’s what she shared with me:

In Conversation with Stephanie O’Neil

What inspired you to start Moms Beyond the 9 to 5?

I started the group because I saw so many moms, including myself, struggling to balance motherhood with work, self-care and their social lives. There’s this unspoken pressure to choose between being a present mom and pursuing your dreams. Without support, it’s really hard to do both. I wanted to create a space where moms could relate to one another and feel supported to do both.

What do you think most moms are missing when it comes to community and support?

Moms are missing real connection that goes beyond small talk. Most moms feel they are alone in their struggles, when in fact that’s not the case at all.

How has having a group of moms around you changed the way you handle stress?

It’s knowing that there is a group of moms who truly get it. Being able to connect with others who either have been in my position or are going through it themselves helps a lot.

What advice would you give to a mom who feels like she doesn’t have anyone in her corner?

Join my group!! No, but seriously, put yourself out there and be vulnerable.

What’s one small, brave step a mom can take today to build more connection in her life?

Reaching out to another mom or joining a group like this one. It’s important to remember that building a connection can take time.

Is there anything else you would like to share with our readers?

I would just say that if you’re feeling disconnected or alone, you’re not the only one. My group is here to make life a little easier, with no pressure, just real support for moms who are trying to figure it out like everyone else.

Gentle Reminder

You don’t have to do this alone. Building external resources doesn’t mean you need ten people on speed dial. It can be one friend. One group chat. One coffee meet-up.

This week, I want you to ask yourself:

Who’s in my corner?

And if the answer feels like no one — what’s one brave step I can take to change that?

By the Fire Pit 🔥

These cooler nights have me back at my fire pit, blanket wrapped tight, just letting myself breathe. It’s become my reset spot — a place to slow down before the rush of the holidays sneaks in.

This week, while sitting there, I listened to an episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast about friendship. She unpacked the lies we tell ourselves — like “everyone else already has their circle” or “it’s too late to make new friends.” Then she shared a simple 3-step playbook for building deeper, more meaningful connections.

It reminded me that friendship isn’t just something that happens when we’re kids or in college — it’s something we can choose to grow, even in the middle of motherhood, work, and stress.

If you need that nudge too, here’s the episode: How to Build Closer Friendships & Get Rid of Loneliness.

Maybe it sparks something for you, maybe it doesn’t — but consider it a little gift from my corner to yours.

Until next time,

💛 Moya